There are 3 milestones in the life of every child that really stand out in the minds of the parents:
- Conception. While the precise moment or position may be hard to determine, that + on the peestick certainly is the hallmark of the right of passage into the child rearing years.
- Childbirth. Undoubtedly the most profound of experiences for both men and women.
- Potty Training. You waited whoknowshowlong for a fertilized egg. You waited 40 weeks for the egg to cook. You wait up to 3(or more) years to get the little beggar out of diapers!
OMG! We were in diapers for nearly 12 solid years! I should have bought Huggies stock. The reek of toddler urine became my new cologne. We couldn’t make love if there wasn’t a wadded up diaper stuffed under a pillow or rolled down between the mattress and headboard. Costco’s P&L suffered when we finally got done with the things.
And what is a parent to do when their child gets to “the age” when he or she should begin to show an interest in going on the toilet but won’t? Is there a good way to encourage our child to take this necessary (for the parents’ sanity) step? Sure there is, and I will share a few that worked for us.
- Bribe ‘em. Yep: Skittles candy were a fave. We offered a few for pee and a handful for poop. Mom and Dad would reward each other with skittles in front of the child just to reinforce the idea. Mom would make sure skittles were set out in the open as a reminder to pee in the toilet.
- Dad takes the boys with him to go pee every time. Lead by example. Talk about it. Joke about it. Make pee time fun and bonding. This is a great time to introduce the “pull my finger” tradition if you have not already. Make sure to dry the walls after all sword fights.
- Always talk in a postive tone about using the big-boy/girl potty. Never demean or try to shame anyone into doing something: the opposite result often happens.
- Hang out with similar age kids who are well potty trained. Don’t make a big deal that your kid’s friend can and he can’t- just let him watch the other boy do his duty. Your child will see this and often “own” his potty training better if you try to coerce him into it. Don’t allow yourself to compare your child to another; he is doing that already in his own mind.
Now, we had one child that potty trained really well during the day, but just could not hold it during the night. We dealt with plastic sheets and beach towels until he was about to enter kindergarten, but it became apparent that he was getting embarrassed about his “problem”. We noticed that he would not want to do sleepovers with friends or anything that would reveal his secret.
Bedwetting seems to be more prevalent in boys than girls, but not unheard of even in teenage girls. Some kids just sleep soundly enough to not notice their body’s signals to hold their pee.
I am bringing this up because lots of parents let the bedwetting thing go longer than need be, thinking that their child will just grow out of it. And many do. But a small percentage of all kids just need a little extra help. Basically, your options are drugs or devices.
We decided to take a pass on the drug route initially. Our pediatrician mentioned a device called a Potty Pager, which we tried and had great success with. Now this is in no way a paid advertisement, but I just wanted to pass along the info about a product called The Night Hawk. The price today is about the same as we paid 12 years ago: about 80 bucks.
The device is about the size and shape of the old Motorola pagers that were worn on the belt. It fits into their underpants and vibrates when any moisture becomes present. Lest ye think the vibrations of the Night Hawk have any resemblance to any of Mommy’s big girl toys- I sincerely doubt it. Sleeping in the next room, I could feel the ground rumble when the thing went off. Seriously, you can’t operate the device within 1000 yards of a cemetary. When it goes off, you might think you are in the grandstands of a NHRA event. And you will go through a lot of batteries.
Like I said, no one is paying me to tell you about the NIght Hawk. It just worked really well for us.
Comment back if you have some other suggestion about how to encourage kids to potty train. I will update my list with your suggestions.
Blessings
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